I’m stupid, do not touch me: how to distinguish a child I do not want from I can not, and what to do about it
UaUa.info talked with the child psychologist Elena Ratinskaya about why you can not scold the child for laziness, from which children are protected when they sabotage their duties, and in what other forms can the energy shortage result in the child.
By the end of the school year, we are waiting for our schoolchildren to mobilize, pull up their tails, correct estimates and say goodbye to the school on a positive note. But for an intensive breakthrough at the finish, many children simply did not have energy left.
Parents try to shake, motivate: Come on, hand it over to 11, you can do it! . And get in return: I can not, do not get! , I do not understand and even Get away from me, I’m stupid!
Elena explained that sometimes such behavior is the only way to reduce the bar of inflated parental requirements. And sometimes this is how total fatigue, lack of strength. As emotional, which we often take for laziness, and a real asthenia.
Asthenia is a manifestation of energy decline at the physiological level. This means that the child has already worked too much not on interest, but on his own energy. In addition to normal fatigue, this condition can be a symptom of a number of diseases. Therefore, if you see signs of asthenia, always consult a pediatrician.
The child began to sleep longer, but in the morning he still wakes up tired.
In the behavior alternate flashes of activity, then passivity. She starts to do something with enthusiasm, but quickly dies. Right before your eyes you can see how the fuse runs out in it.
He begins to draw, and after 10 minutes you can see how his hand slows, the pressure of the pencil becomes weaker, and the picture becomes pale. First he painted over quickly and densely, then slowly, then in different directions. Then the shading goes into shading: Now, it's all brown.
From the youngest age, children need to be taught to relax. So that they can lie down for 10-15 minutes, rest, dream up.
I in my practice really like active fantasy. The child lies down, and we present with him some story. Let's fly with you to some island where you feel good, the place of your strength. What do you see there, you feel? And the child in his imagination walks, looks. Such an inner cartoon as a dream in reality.
During this fantasy the child does not sleep, but the muscles are relaxed, the nervous system is relaxed, the internal state is stabilized. During such trips, children can relax even better than during sleep, especially if there are problems with sleeping.