My daughter began to ask a question: did I want more for me to have a boy or a girl? The question, of course, is logical for a six-year-old child. But before answering, I had to think about my words well.
After all, you will not tell the child the truth, which itself does not like. During pregnancy, even though I told everyone that it didn’t matter to me who would be born to me, but she secretly hoped for a boy. Well, to bring joy to dad, so that his successor would grow.
For some reason, the successor for my mother did not think at all. And in principle, I did not care about myself. Because such thoughts arose. But you can’t explain the same thing to a child – you won’t understand, no matter how hard you try. And the unpleasant aftertaste is sure to remain.
I remember how my dad told me that he, too, wanted a son. And as a daughter was born, he shaved his mustache according to his given promise. After the birth of my sister, I repeated this manipulation. By the way, he doesn’t have a mustache at all, so for him to shave off his mustache is a very decisive step.
Then I often heard him talking about friends to our family Babskoy kingdom, meaning he was one man here. Now I am almost sure that he didn’t mean anything bad, but then I could not hear such unpleasant things. As if I was to blame for not being born a boy.
By the way, once I watched the movie Sex in the City, and there the husband of one of the heroines after the birth of her second daughter proudly stated something like: I live like in a flower garden! I almost burst into tears. After all, these words allow the daughter to be proud that she is a girl. And all my unconscious life I regretted that I was not born a boy.
Therefore, I did not begin to devote my daughter to my complexes. Although she did not dare to utterly curse the soul, crucifying about how I dreamed of a girl. She said a neutral thought, which she had previously told everyone. It didn’t really matter to me who was born, a girl or a boy. It is much more important to me that this is my favorite child.
A boy would be born – good. A girl was born – generally wonderful! I still love my child very much, whatever it is. Now I can talk about it honestly and with an open heart, as it really is. I can’t even imagine how I would raise a boy.
But I do not know how convincing it sounds for a child. It is evident, not quite, as the daughter periodically asks this question again. I don’t think she forgets the answer. Perhaps you need to find some more convincing phrases.
Do children ask you such questions? How do you get out of the situation?