Recently, on the recommendation of my brother’s mother-in-law, I gathered to read a book by A. Nekrasov (not the one that was late autumn, the rooks flew away, but the other) called Maternal Love.
I specifically specified who advised the book in order to indicate that this is not a person of the same age, but an adult, experienced person. So, the epigraph in the book is: Mother’s heart in children, and children’s heart in stone.
In other words, the mother loves and gives all of herself to the children, and these feelings, alas, do not evoke a response. Frankly, I have mastered pages 20, in which the author (of course, the man) assured that a woman should first of all please and cherish her husband, and the children should be sometime later if time remains.
I do not argue, I do not have the right to criticize the book after reading a few dozen pages, but I really could not read further, because the author’s opinion did not at all coincide with mine.
Perhaps in the future I will change my opinion, even though I do not believe in it and do not want it. At the moment, my love for my daughter is so huge and all-consuming that I could not even imagine the existence of a feeling of such power.
One of my friends, a mother of two children, almost always puts her interests above the interests of the children and her husband. I do not claim that she does not love children, just this love is either not visible, or she simply shows it in a different way.
Then in the third month of pregnancy, the second child decides to fly to a rest on another continent, then at 2 months her daughter reached the nightclubs. And once, in the period of terrible heat in the city, instead of taking the child out of the places with melting asphalt, she and her friend flew off to the sea.
This behavior is a little incomprehensible to me, I am even afraid to imagine a vacation without a daughter. It seems to me that without her, this would no longer be a rest, but solid thoughts about my baby. Even in those rare moments when we leave our daughter for the night with my grandmother (for the first time it happened already at the age of 3), I somehow cannot relax until the end – I am bored and it is unusual without her.
It happens that children absolutely change their parents. For example, I never thought that my brother was an adult, respected man, a famous professional athlete, a multiple national champion, etc. she will compose fairy tales to her daughter, feed her from a spoon, tell about the intricacies of the fishing process.
As they say, all men want a son, but they love their daughter more. True, they have no son yet, but the attitude of fathers to daughters always touches me. Especially those who in everyday life are harsh, strict, tough, and at home they turn into a huge cat that fools around with a little baby.
Another friend of mine, also a mother of two children, is completely unfamiliar with the childhood of her children. She did not breastfeed, and went to work a month after delivery. The children had a nanny who looked after two at the same time; she even made crafts for the kindergarten of the eldest son and was engaged in buying clothes for the youngest daughter.
I do not claim that due to minimal contact, these parents love children less. Now the kids are no longer kids, they go to the 5th and 2nd grades, there is no nanny, but there is a housekeeper, whose duties include, if necessary, to pick up children from school, take them to circles and do homework if necessary.
Perhaps due to the fact that communication with parents is less, it seems to be more concentrated, or something. I am sure that they adore children, they often relax together, solve conflict situations and provide children with material benefits. Just such a love.
Probably, I never loved anyone as much as my daughter. I love her any – capricious, funny, sad, naughty. I adore her smell, fingers and every mole. I say twenty times a day that I love her and am very happy to hear a similar phrase in response.
I can just watch her sleep and look forward to when she wakes up, because I feel bored without her. I look out the window as she walks with the kindergarten group, and I look forward to when it comes time to pick her up.
I searched online stores in search of such a desirable T-shirt with Dasha-ranger and made a kengurushka with Masha and the Bear to order. I cut the hearts out of the bread and take the pepper pieces out of the soup. I am looking for rubber boots with pussies and a backpack with princesses. Someone will say that I have too much free time, that’s why I’m doing nonsense. Perhaps, but I am so glad when my daughter is glad.
Once again about the book mentioned above and the epigraph to it. Somehow I called the daughter Zainka in the store, come here, and the woman next to her grumbled, I also called mine a little darling, and she is now waiting for me to die to occupy the apartment. I want to believe that I will not, that I bring up differently. Remember how in the series of the famous TV show Charlotte and Trey look at the rowdy neighbors’ children and say the phrase that all childless parents mistakenly say: Our children will be different! 😉
Of course, there are families in which the life of a child’s parents does not interest. For some, it does not matter the number of children, and in general, they appear because it happened. I sympathize with parents who have not seen the first step, the first smile of a child. They did not see them, because they did not want to see them, because they were not interested in them.
Every day you can only hear on the news how mothers throw children, scoff at them and other terrible consequences of the absence of parental love. I am terribly sorry for the children, sorry for the tears and it is not clear – for what innocent kids get these parents.
Do not miss every moment of your child’s development. Feel free to show your feelings towards him. I remember how I suffered from the fact that my daughter constantly demanded to carry her in her arms. And now I sometimes want to take her in my arms, but she no longer wants, says that she is an adult …