It always seemed to me that my child is behaving normally, as for his age. He does not sit in one seat, but he doesn’t rush like mad. But sometimes, when she is very frisky, I hear from those present that she is too pampered. So I think what it is – the optimal degree of freedom and severity for the child in behavior?
Emotions and relatives
Usually I am not very worried about the comments of strangers to me. You can’t explain anything to anyone, and is it necessary? When my child starts to behave too emotionally, I almost always know what the reason is, because I try to use it for comfort.
And sometimes I do not see the point of reassuring. If I take her out of the kindergarten and she is extremely happy to see me, then why not let her look for joy on the street? Or when relatives come, whom she loves and whom she hasn’t seen for a long time, it is logical that her joys have no limits, and all of this is splashed out by running, jumping and squealing.
It happens, of course, that one has to slow down the child. For example, her husband’s sister often shares her personal problems upon arrival. It is necessary to listen to her, comfort, give some advice – all this takes time and attention. The child can not long withstand the fact that the mother is absorbed in the wrong talk.
Begins to interrupt, to demand to shut up and listen to her. Naturally, you have to make comments, explain something. In the end, this is the process of education. But sometimes you can’t stop a child.
Recently visited the grandmother of her husband. The child in the village namayalsya, and when I said that we were going home, joy knew no bounds. At parting, I tried to take a picture of my grandmother with her great-granddaughter. Yeah, the last one couldn’t be made to stand still for a second! It is good that the relatives understand this and do not take offense.
Public place and child
But there are just brain-bearing situations, like, for example, today. Traditionally, we came on Saturdays to visit our dad. He came in a slightly faded condition, since he had not recovered from a cold. But for the child this is not an argument – she demanded all-consuming attention from him throughout our long walk through the city.
On the one hand, I understand her, sees dad less often than I used to, wants to play around with him, play and tell him a lot. But, not having achieved the desired, today she was hysterical at every step: they didn’t go there, they didn’t become like that, they didn’t say it, and so on. At what it was clear that the scream was a mock one, and the tears were barely squeezed out.
I understand that this is the usual manipulation of the child. But, on the other hand, you will not explain to those around you that these tears and shouts have their own reason, which is simply not solved now. And to look for weighty arguments and to show wonders of fantasy in calming a child for five hours to a row is beyond my power.
So I thought today, maybe I really spoiled her that I could not keep from screaming and tantrums out of the blue with a murderous argument: I want it !? And where is this line between a spoiled and raised child?