There are no children, the process of education which takes place without conflicts and controversial situations. With someone less problems, with someone – on the contrary. Today I would like to talk about the difficulties that I faced.
Their peak occurred at the age of 2-3 years. Now, when the daughter is almost 4, there are practically none. Either she outgrown this period, or my hard work gave its fruits.
Previously, the daughter could turn on the siren only because I bought her juice not with a teddy bear, but with a girl, for example. I am sure that conversations do not work at a young age. It is now I can explain that money can be spent on something more worthwhile, and indeed, beautiful packaging does not mean good content.
Often, mothers (I will not hide it, and I had it) do not hold back and also go on crying, and some even punish or beat the child, trying in this way to show who’s the boss and generally sober the baby. But sometimes the child only needs motherly embrace to calm down.
Of course, this method is wrong. No matter how difficult it is, you should remain calm, self-control and not fall into a state of hysteria. The easiest way is to give the little manipulator what you want, as long as he calms down. Obviously, the child will learn: crying is the easiest and most reliable way to get what he wants.
Fights with peers
Again, by the age of four, their numbers have almost disappeared. And at about three years old I had to constantly be at arm’s length from my daughter to prevent conflicts on the court.
It seems to me that the reason is that up to three years, children are more inclined to play themselves, and after that they prefer collective activities and games with friends. And the realization that toys should be shared, and to negotiate about controversial moments, does not come immediately.
Often the baby considers the use of force the most effective and simple way to resolve a conflict. The reason for this may be assault on the part of parents, for example. After all, slapping on the pope often occurs even when all other methods do not work.
As with tantrums, you should wait out. All this time (it took a little over a year from a daughter) to control and explain-speak-tell about the rules of behavior with children.
When the two-year-old daughter began to realize that she could protest, and he would be accepted, she began to oppose brushing her teeth and washing her hair. Beautiful brushes helped us with our teeth – electric with the Little Mermaid, for example, and pastes with berry flavor.
I already wrote about washing my hair – praise for shampoos with princesses and, of course, without stories about the benefits of clean hair and beautiful hairstyles, there would be nothing.
Behavior in public places
I do not know for what children in the restaurants hold high chairs for feeding, but my daughter could not sit in one place for more than a minute. However, if you give her a package of napkins and toothpicks, then the time of fixation in one place increased to about three minutes.
A trip to a cafe with a small child (up to about 2.5 years) was for me something between a visit to the dentist and an annual report to the pension fund. Ie, in a business that I didn’t like very much.
I do not belong to the category of people who operate on the expression well, it’s children! and mysteriously smile at the sight of a child winding spaghetti around his wrist. I believe that children should not interfere with the pastime of others.
Indulgence and concessions
I have been working on this problem so far and I cannot say for now whether it is successful. On the one hand, I often give in, but I do it not because I consider this option the easiest way, but because I do not find it difficult, for example, on the way to kindergarten I’d go home and take a scooter, because my daughter asked.
My mother often says that in this way the child will sit on my neck and hang my legs, that it is necessary to be more strict and categorical in the aspects of upbringing. But I don’t want my daughter’s mother to be associated with bans and unfulfilled desires.
That is why I can buy ice cream in the winter (on condition that it is eaten at home), during daytime sleep I am looking for a suspension with a kitty and even endure posing in photos like the Winx fairies.
Every parent has different difficulties associated with raising children. However, one should remember the ancient wisdom – And this will pass. And what may now seem to you to the limit of your patience, after a while will turn into just a memory.
Virtually no process can do without difficulties, and the upbringing of a small person is even more so. Do not forget that for every child a calm mom is important, who knows how to control her emotions and explain in an accessible form how to behave in a given situation.
And what problems did you encounter when raising children?