Today I talked with the mother of the girl from our kindergarten and was horrified. One and the same thought constantly sounded in her words: life is hard, the child needs to be helped to survive, otherwise some difficulties await him ahead. I wanted to protest – why from childhood to invest such negative attitudes in a child? After all, he will live like this!
Revision of children’s installations
Of course, you won’t put your head on other people’s shoulders. Because I did not get involved in an argument, especially since we were talking on a completely different topic, in a hurry on the way to a stop of transport. But I thought that by throwing such phrases in vain and with a child, we were already spoiling his life.
I remembered how the day before I was surprised at my daughter’s reflections. Since this year she has to go to school, now there is a lot of talk on this topic. But she gave me a clear, well-known algorithm from an early age: I will go to school to study, I will receive only five, then I will graduate from the institute, and they will hire me.
Monologue Thanks, Grandma! Is it necessary to prepare a child for this? Does he have to learn in order for someone to hire him? But the child perceives these words literally. It is clear that my grandmother wanted the best, but my experience of growing up shows that this is not the best life scenario.
I remember that I had problems with parental attitudes when the question of admission to college arose. It was a very crucial step. After all, it was necessary not to make a mistake with the direction, the profession is chosen once in a lifetime. And they also get married once.
What was for me the discovery that I can develop in any direction that interests me. Moreover, my interests and development vector can also change in life, and not just once. I don’t even want to talk about breaking the template when my husband left. The brain refused to accept this fact at all – it simply could not happen to me!
Recovering from a mild shock of what attitudes my child is forming now, feverishly proceeded to correct them. First of all, she said that her daughter would go to school in order to learn a lot of new things about the whole world, to understand that she was interested most of all and continue to learn what she really liked.
Look for a job not the one where they take you, but the one she would like to do. And yes, mom gets tired when she works hard, but she likes this job. This is not hard labor, but hard work.
In general, I feel that you will have to carefully monitor the negative attitudes that are imposed on the child. And not only grandmother. Adults around a lot.
Do you follow what you invest in a child?