I will note in advance that I do not in any way impose my methods of education, and I don’t like to climb with advice to others. It’s just that our Russian soul is – just to talk and let us gossip 🙂
Situation # 1, one floor above.
My mom’s neighbors are Olga’s girlfriend (a year younger than me), her husband and a girl of 2 years old. Periodically, the grandmother (the girl’s mother) comes to help them. Not that Olya and I were friends, but as neighbors, we always greeted each other, exchanged common phrases, communicated more closely during periods when they poured us.
So, the child they constantly scream. More truly, does not shout, and shouts, hysterically squeals. One gets the impression that the girl is either beaten or starved. My mother says that screams and roars are heard at night, moreover, the impression is that there is no one at home and the child screams and howls with fear.
Several times both I and my mother were interested in the causes of screams. To which the grandmother replied: Oh, yes, she is an artificial woman, she cannot wait until the mixture is warmed up, that’s capricious. And indeed, she has such an allergy !. I am not familiar with the subtleties of artificial feeding of children, but I guess that heating water is not such a long thing.
Olya answered me several times, they say, the daughter behaves badly, does not obey, but in principle, everything is all right with them and, apparently, it seemed to me.
I often see a girl on the street – an absolutely normal child, calm and smiling baby. Their dad is also quite adequate, a musician (classical music) and an intellectual.
What to do? Call the guardianship? Once again, it is already somehow inconvenient to be interested in the situation in the family of neighbors …
Situation number 2, at the bus stop
Yesterday I waited for a minibus at the bus stop, and for several minutes I watched the scene of communication between my mother and 9-year-old daughter. The conversation was loud, the essence of the incident – the girl stole 200 hryvnias from the mother (about $ 25) in order to give the boy out of class 15 of them for some reason.
They were dressed well (not the homeless), clean and neat, but my mother’s speech left much to be desired. It was you and the creature, I will imprison you, You are such a beast, what was your right? etc. Then the girl received a slap from the mother. I told my mother that she had no right to behave this way with the child, to which she was rude to me, they say, do not tell me what to do, and I will not tell you where to go.
Then I got into a minibus and thought that, apparently, than fertilized, it grew. But, on the other hand, it is a pity for the girl – after all, if the mother allows herself such in public, one can only guess what will happen to her at home. On the third hand, you can not steal. And with the fourth, this is a child … In general, I am still in thought.
Situation number 3, in the store
I will say in advance that I have an incredible, tender, affectionate and understanding daughter. True, depending on the phase of the moon and other natural phenomena, it can turn into a union of a calf and a bull, under the signs of which she was born – stubborn and capricious (all in me). I do not welcome corporal punishment; I use this method only in very extreme cases (yes, I know that this means admitting my own impotence and, in general, this is not possible).
Today, she stubbornly did not want to go upstairs to the second floor, even though I explained to her that I needed to buy water. And in response, the great simulator told in all details how tired she was and in what places her legs hurt. The child at that time was not hungry, she was not hot, she did not want to drink.
The child violently insisted on his own – I will stand here and in general, go to the cashier. The conversation with me is short – I put the products out of the basket (in which were her favorite curds with magnets!) And quickly took my daughter out of the store.
To say that the queue was looking at me judgingly – to say nothing! Some even said something like a poor child and would-be mother. I just said loudly and clearly, that telling mom what to do and what not, the child has no right and is forbidden to direct my actions.
You should not interfere in the educational processes of outsiders. Each case is individual and you cannot know all its details. And my position is this – to keep my mouth shut, because it is likely that in the near future it will turn into an aunt, who nags under his breath: oh, horror, on the street 25, and a child without a cap !.
What do you think about these situations?