In each mom’s life, there comes a period when she notices that the baby seems to have been replaced. The child becomes whiny, hot-tempered and scandalous. The kid goes into hysterics in order to achieve his. Our daughter has such a fertile period of two and a half years.
Striving for independence
Baby felt like an adult and self. We always try to support her in this. We want her to believe in her strength. But during the crisis of three years, the daughter tried to take the reins in their hands. Every our refusal caused an outburst of indignation.
The kids feel great the emotions of their parents and try to put pressure on our weak points. For me it was very unpleasant to make our quarrels for everyone to see, and my daughter unconsciously used it.
To achieve the desired result, she arranged a noisy tantrum. She did not become a hysterical bridge stand, but screams, weeping and stomping could be heard throughout the neighborhood. Mothers who have been in my situation, remember the feeling of confusion and shame that you feel in those moments.
I understood that it was important not to miss the moment. If the child succeeds once, he will repeat the tantrum after each failure. I decided to act consistently.
Fight in all directions
The baby began to be capricious when it was time to eat or sleep. We changed the daily routine and began to go out only after eating. If you had to leave for a long time, we took some snack.
If we went to the store, we would discuss the shopping list in advance. The list has always been a place of small joy for the daughter (juice, stickers). At home, I explained that I only take money for what is on the list. In the store I was reminded of our contract and it always worked.
Hysterics have caused us to return home from a walk. Here we had to be creative and each time invent a new incentive to go home. We will sculpt pies. See a cartoon. We pollen flowers.
For ten minutes, I warned us that we were finishing playing and we would soon collect toys and say goodbye to the children. But without tears we did not return home.
I noticed that before the scandal, the baby was beginning to be capricious and moaning. If you distract her in time, then the matter did not reach hysterics. The main thing is to show imagination and come up with something interesting. For example, to tell how a cat washes its kittens, to offer some magic dandelions.
If we could not prevent an explosion of emotions, then I patiently and calmly waited for my daughter to calm down. I squatted beside her and was silent. Conviction in this state only worsen the situation. We arranged a detailed analysis of the flights later when the baby calmed down.
Grandmothers refused to speak as one. When the first tears appeared, they rushed to fulfill all desires, wore on their hands and kissed. This increased attention only worsened the situation. Had a long time to convince lovely grannies.
But we managed. The time of crisis has passed, the tantrums retreated, and Lena and I have learned how to negotiate.