I don’t know if all children behave this way at first, but began to notice that the child is often a coward. I do not mean the fear of darkness, heights or big dogs. The fact that she turns off the sound when watching a cartoon on scary moments doesn’t scare me as much as naughty, trying to avoid responsibility.
Source of cowardice
I understand that, out of the blue, such a reaction cannot occur. Probably analyzed some of my behavior, my husband, and decided that it was easier to do that. And we have a wonderful example.
Dad left the family, and does not tell anyone about it – a coward. Mom is also good, she cowards before unpleasant conversations and covers dad in front of his relatives. In general, a great example of ostrich problem solving.
Although, again, maybe this is a natural human reaction. Maybe if you prompt the child in time how to act correctly, he will develop the necessary habit? Looked at her own childhood. There are a lot of such episodes where I was a coward and I was ashamed of it. Many still remember clearly, although I was then as old as my daughter now.
My mother’s dear Kokhinorovsky pencil broke and threw away under the sofa. Hit the ball in the window of a neighbor. The window did not break, but the neighbor still jumped out at us to shout. I still didn’t have the heart to admit that I hit the ball. The boy took the blame younger than me.
I sat down and thought what was I most afraid of then? What a fuck on me. I already understood that I did wrong, but I didn’t want to listen at all to my cries. Surely my child is experiencing exactly the same feelings – turning off the sound of cartoons during terrible episodes is a confirmation of this.
Then I tried in such situations to pull myself together and explain exactly what I demand from the child and why. This gave its first fruits. For example, the grandmother bought us a children’s seat on the toilet, but it does not fit in size – a bit too big, unstable.
Long stood idle, fell down the dust, but then the child wanted to use it. At first I simply said: No, she is dirty and fidgeting. The arguments were unconvincing. Once I discovered a dirty harnessed on the toilet – the child forgot to cover their tracks.
Then, instead of yelling, I (after exhaling three times) explained once again that it was still not comfortable to sit on it. But right now I am dissatisfied with my daughter because she soiled the ring of the toilet and sat on the dirty one. If she really needed to make sure that she was uncomfortable to sit, she had to wash the seat first, and then experiment.
The next trip to the toilet was significantly delayed. When I went to clarify what was the matter, I found a child in the bathroom washing this ill-fated ring. What should I do? Praised for the work done and understanding.
But it only seems to me that the re-education of cowardice does not end there. We must also teach the child to take responsibility for their decisions, whatever it may be. Recently, she accidentally tore off the cover of my new book, which I also did not have time to finish reading. And quietly put it back on the shelf.
When I discovered this, I was indignant, she sadly answered me: Mom, I thought you would not notice … The only way out in such situations, it seems to me, is adequate punishment. But in this matter I have not figured it out yet.
And how do you eradicate cowardice in a child?