Today, my four-year-old daughter brought someone else’s toy from kindergarten. Of course, I was surprised to see an unfamiliar toy, and asked my daughter where she came from. On this question, Ksyusha without a shadow of embarrassment told me that she took her in kindergarten. I felt uneasy, but I did not scold my daughter.
I immediately remembered an episode from my childhood. I grew up in the Soviet Union, where many things were unusual for Soviet children. And once – I was about 6 years old – I saw at my girlfriend, whose father went abroad, a set of very beautiful hair ties. There were so many! And I decided that nothing terrible will happen if I take one …
But my mother, who found this gum among my things, very calmly and kindly explained to me that taking someone else’s was not good. And then, despite my resistance, gently but firmly insisted that I return the gum and apologize. I remembered this lesson for the rest of my life.
If the kid steals
Of course, the reaction of parents largely depends on how an adult child. If we are talking about a child who has not reached 4-5 years old, talking about theft is stupid. At this age, the kids still have a very vague idea of their own and others.
The kid, who very much wants to have this or that thing, just takes it, not realizing that he is doing wrong. And therefore, in any case, it is impossible to scold him. It is much more reasonable to talk with a crumb, explaining to him why you can not take other people’s things.
A very widespread mistake of parents is the immediate purchase of the toy that the child wanted to have. Otherwise, the baby may notice the relationship, and theft will become an unpleasant pattern.
If the student steals
If we are talking about a child older than 7 – 8 years, the reaction should be a little different. At this age, the child is already well aware of what exactly he does. And parents should strictly suppress such phenomena. However, in this case it is impossible to arrange a child scandal and stormy debriefing.
You must be very strict, but at the same time, calmly talk to the child, letting him know that you will never tolerate such behavior. Explain to the child what such actions may lead to. If the child is old enough, you can even tell him about criminal responsibility for theft.
In no case do not deprive the child of his things in punishment for theft. Such a measure is quite common among parents. But in fact, this is not the way to punish a child. Child psychologists believe that depriving a child of his things will only cause aggression and lies, which will further aggravate the problem.
Be sure to pay attention to who your child communicates with. Unfortunately, at a certain age, friends have a much greater influence on a child than a family. You should not think that this is your child who is so unlucky – all children pass through this stage of growing up. And it would be much better to protect him from communicating with friends who set a bad example than to clear up the consequences afterwards.