Now I am on maternity leave, but before that I worked as a kindergarten teacher. Each child is unique and individual. Mothers often allow many children because they love, but it is very sad to watch when the child begins to get hysterical, and the parents react incorrectly to the child’s hysteria, which further strengthens the child’s hysteria.
In raising a child, every mother faces childish hysteria. Some mothers can find the right approach to the child at once and the tantrums no longer repeat, others listen to the tantrums of the children not only at home, but also in the store, on the street, in kindergarten. Is it possible to fight hysteria? Of course, it is also possible for the normal development of the child.
Tantrum is a type of child aggression. which completely captures the child when he achieves the desired, but sometimes can no longer control his feeling and cannot calm down on his own. All because of your misunderstanding of the child and the wrong method of calming. It is very easy to bring a child to a tantrum, but it is very difficult to calm or not bring to a tantrum, but it is possible.
Case one – you go with the child on occasion
The child very quickly begins to realize that if he only starts hysteria, he gets everything he needs. You surrendered, and the child won. At such moments, the child is in great confusion. He got what he wanted, which means that he won a great authority. If a child has won such an adult authority like you, then who will defend him now, if he (the child) turned out to be stronger than an adult.
Case two – you shout at the child until he stops hysteria
If you start screaming at the child in moments of hysterics, after 5-10 minutes you will not be able to calm him down. You do not want your child choked with a fit of unbridled anger? At such moments, the child can catch his breath. This is not a simulation! A child who exhales all the air from the lungs during a cry gets a reflex reaction – the child is silent and does not breathe for up to 60 seconds, takes a breath, screams again.
Do not aggravate the children’s tantrum with your cry. You are an adult and it is easier for you to calm your anger. The child still does not know how to calm down independently, so calming him down is your task. You must teach your child to calm down if you want to see him mentally healthy, calm and cheerful.
The third case – to pay off
It so happens that it is easier for us to buy a toy or a chocolate bar for a child so that he can stop hysteria in any sphere of life. Soon, the child will understand everything and will buy and sell everything he wants.
The third case is correct.
I see that you are not in the mood now and I am very sorry, because I wanted to play with you (talk, tell a fairy tale, go for a walk or your option). As soon as you are calm, we will talk with you (we will play, we will listen to the fairy tale, we will walk) and leave the room, where your child will continue to hysterically. A child from misunderstanding may start screaming even louder, knocking more often, experimenting with the power of sound and intensity. But you have to be patient and wait until the child calms down.
Record the date and duration of the tantrum each time. Do not be alarmed if the child firstly becomes frequent with tantrums – this is normal. Very soon, your child will begin to understand that you are impenetrable and it is better to calmly solve problems, because as soon as he calms down – you begin to live a normal life.
If you try to understand the child and apply the rule of ignoring during a tantrum, then very soon your child will understand that a tantrum is not the best way to get what you want. and easier to ask for. True, a baby can get hysteria in 2-3 days, and it is necessary to wean 2-3 months. Be patient!
My daughter does not hysteria because I learned to cope with her attempts at hysteria. I think this article will help you to find that way of behavior when your child is better to just negotiate with you than not to hysteria.