Children without whims and bad habits do not happen, it is difficult to argue with this statement.
Caprices, caprices, fidgets and visionaries – our children, cultivated in love and permissiveness, sometimes show a bad temper, wonders of ingenuity and demonstrate bad habits, and at the most inopportune moment.
Our children are a reflection of ourselves, and in them, as in a mirror, we see all our flaws and misses.
Of course, we are not the ideal educators, and often we ourselves are pushing children towards bad behavior. Is the child lying? Understand, lies and fantasy are similar, but to discern this rich imagination or the desire to shield oneself by hiding unseemly deeds or to show oneself better than it actually is, it is still possible.
A child who lies to everyone always and everywhere – composing whole epics, is just a dreamer. His imagination knows no boundaries, and he lives in the world of his own heroes and events. How to be a mother who is tired of hearing complaints from caregivers that my son is grafting and becomes a victim of ridicule?
Give the child more of his attention – confidentially listen to his fantasies first, giving him the opportunity to throw out his emotions at home, even before bedtime.
Support his story, add. Start writing a book together, developing a storyline in which your child can become the main character – let it be your secret, believe me, he will gradually decrease his desire to put his fantasies into public discussion. You will have your own circle of initiates, surround him with an aura of mystery and create a chamber atmosphere – finally, the circle of conspirators, like-minded people.
Teach your child to separate fiction from reality, but do not block the flight of fantasy with all sorts of shouts and prohibitions – who knows, maybe someday he will become a famous science fiction writer, and he will devote his book to you … But if a child lies to hide the truth and avoid punishment – it means Your parenting system is imperfect, it’s impossible to educate, intimidating, only explanation, arguments, examples and trust will allow the child to understand what is possible and what is not – fear creates protective reactions, among which lies are in the first place.
What if the child likes to fight, offending everyone around, even those who are weaker? This problem often becomes acute in the event that a boy grows up in an incomplete family – this is how he realizes his masculinity, which may be suppressed at home, in the circle of his mother and grandmother. There reigns the female world, soft, quiet, cozy, but absolutely not giving him the opportunity to express themselves.
Having broken free, the boy loudly declares that he is strong and courageous, not realizing that masculinity should not always be associated with physical strength – the mother can raise a defender in him if she doesn’t lisp, do everything for him and consciously avoid male influence . Try to give the child to the men’s section, let him more often come into contact with the world of men and understand that you can only fight with an equal and only if there is a significant reason.
As for small habits, such as untidiness or laziness – here the mother should look for ways to influence, focusing only on her own feelings and knowledge of her own child – such methods as comparison, persuasion or a good example work best. If your daughter is crazy about Winx, but her clothes are stained all the time – tell her the story of another Winx who once studied in Alfea, but was expelled for negligence and inability to behave in society … See how this story will affect the behavior of your beauty!
With mine, for example, it worked – now she brushes her hair like a Winx, eats carefully, as Winx and even tries to conjure – the blessing with chemistry is not yet familiar! But as one grew older, another problem arose – the reluctance to go to bed at the right time, which we are also fighting with cunning. But more about that later.