I grew up in a large and friendly large family. Mom and Dad had four daughters. They are great lads, they worked very hard to provide us with a good education, often forgetting about themselves, giving all the best to us. My sisters and I are very grateful to them, however, I often thought, and do I want such a big family?
Children are a big responsibility.
When our child was born, the first thing that friends and acquaintances began to ask: And when will you make the second ?. In my answer, however, that one would be enough for us, I met with incomprehension and surprise. And to my argument that there is too much beauty in life to refuse it for the sake of a large number of children, they called me selfish.
In my opinion, children are a big responsibility. You can’t consider your duty fulfilled to them only by the fact that you brought them to the light. In my opinion, it is not. Children need a lot of things for a harmonious and happy life.
1) This is the love and attention of parents. Children need to spend time with them. In our family, mom worked half a day, and dad from morning to evening. He wanted to provide a family, his children financially, but at the same time he came home very tired in the evening, and he did not have the strength even to just play with us. To be honest, I really missed him. Due to the fact that he has never been around, we do not have such close relationships with him, such as, for example, with his mother.
2) It is very difficult for children to be happy if their parents cannot give them basic material benefits. In my understanding, this is a high-quality nutrition, high-quality new clothing, the opportunity to attend developmental activities (sections, clubs, courses, etc.), rest and leisure (camps, vacations), the opportunity to get a good higher education. I believe that these are things that every parent MUST give to their child.
Everyone decides for himself
Of course, each person decides for himself how big his family will be. But it is important to realize your strength. I do not believe in the saying. If God gave a rabbit, he would give a lawn. Now from the media, society, the environment on the family is quite a lot of pressure. They talk about the fall of demography, about the extinction of the Russian people, they introduce dubious support at the birth of the next child.
But I think that first of all you need to think about the welfare of your family. About its financial capabilities. It is important not to forget about yourself. If you try, you can lift up ten people, but at the same time, you can miss your whole life while at work.
I sincerely respect those people who love children and see their happiness in motherhood, are ready to postpone their ambitions, dreams, aspirations for later, and perhaps even abandon them for the sake of children. But at the same time, I believe that in our reality, children are quite expensive. And before you give birth to a child, and even more so a few, it is necessary to weigh everything and count it many times. Especially when finances sing romances.