When the child is first in the family, the parents do not know how to raise it properly. You can re-read a bunch of books, listen to the advice of others, and act according to the instructions, but the nature of each child is different. We have to eat a bit under it, and some generally accepted methods and rules of education do not work.
Stages and methods of education
Initially, my husband and I planned to keep our son in hedgehogs. From the very birth, of course, it didn’t work according to this principle, but I wanted to. Up to five months, my husband and I walked in the wake of the baby, we felt sorry for it, blew the dust particles, and almost took it into our hands. There were hard times, but nothing can be done.
When the son grew up a little, began to understand something, we began to educate him a little. More precisely not we, and I (dad was very sorry for the crumbs). For example, when he was naughty, whimpering and asking for his hands, I did not succumb to his tantrums, then the child calmed down and continued to play. Also in other situations, when something you forbid a kid (to take some thing, for example), he rolls up a scandal, and here the main thing is to show him your calmness, patience and indifference.
I have already developed immunity to tears and hysteria of my son, and he, knowing that I would not give in to his provocations, almost never was capricious, but if somewhere in the vicinity there is a dad or grandmother, well, or other strangers, a child arranged the show. To what I am getting at, it turns out that mom brings up strictly, dad indulges. Mom is a cruel boy, and papa is good. But this should not be allowed in the family.
Dad – good, mom – bad
The father will always regret, take the pens, give my son everything he wants. And mom doesn’t pay attention at all. By the way, sometimes the husband himself suffers from his too mild attitude towards the child, because the baby does not leave him a single step, everywhere on his heels, does not allow him to do anything. As a result, the child will be more like dad, and I will be far from him. This is our huge mistake in education, and something needs to be done about it.
We cannot find a middle ground, and the reason is this: I communicate with my son more than my husband, and I cannot keep up with him all the time. Dad comes home from work in the evening, leaves in the morning, on weekends and does not always spend with the child, that’s why he pampers the baby. So I can’t persuade him to be a little more pessimistic with the little one, he doesn’t understand and understand.
Here we have such a dilemma. How to solve it I do not know. I know many families, where the relationship of parents with a child is identical. All, of course, depends on the nature of mom and dad. But here, unfortunately, they are very different, which is why it comes out this way.