Somehow, historically, the strong half of humanity fears the weakest and most defenseless creature on the planet – the human baby. Fear is connected with the fact that dads are afraid to break something for a child. And they do not want to look in the eyes of their beloved stupid clumsies. How to make sure that your husband does not become isolated in himself and communicate with the baby, starting from the first days of his life?
In fact, if the child is desired, the pope will certainly want to communicate with him. And this desire may occur while the baby is still in your tummy. The main thing is not push him away at such moments.
As soon as we learned about the pregnancy, I found a calendar that listed the development of the child weekly. Moreover, it was present as a physical description (which is how the child grows) and psychological (for which the mother should not be nervous, what the baby feels, can she feel something). Every week I sent a link to the calendar, and closer to the middle of my pregnancy, my dad read ahead and told me what was coming.
But then the tummy began to grow, and the husband began to glance at him with some apprehension. I wanted to get attention. So that dad would look at him as a living being in his mother’s house, and not like a ram … well, you understood me. Then I began to talk with the baby out loud. And one day my husband joined me. After that, he greeted the baby every morning, and in the evening he wished good night.
There was another time when friends came to visit us and the husband relaxed with them a little. After we were alone, dad decided to sing a lullaby for the baby. It was very nice and funny at the same time. But laughing in such situations is clearly forbidden. Otherwise, it closes, goes into itself. Best to support. Having a lot of songs, happy, we went to bed.
The first months after pregnancy
Here, in my opinion, and you need to take the bull by the horns. While dad is in the euphoria of such a great event, let him communicate with the child as often as possible. My main mistake was the idea that my husband gets very tired at work, he needs to rest. And I’m on maternity leave and taking care of the baby is my holy duty. Yes, that’s all true. But if you do not start now, then it will be more difficult.
What can be charged to dad?
Any task associated with close proximity to the baby. In addition to changing diapers – do not hurt your dad like that at once. Suppose it could be:
– help with changing / dressing (hold the leg, handle, head, spread the diaper under the baby, move the cap, tie a bow, put on socks),
– put the baby in the crib
– give you a baby when you’re ready to feed him
– support when bathing, wrap in a towel
– check if the baby is awake, cover with a blanket.
Agree, this is all the pope can do. So he learns to take care of the baby.
Do not wait for the moment when you are unbearably tired, begin to teach dad to new responsibilities now. So you will save strength and dad to quickly connect to the care of the baby.
Sooner or later, the husband still finds that childcare is not such a difficult process. For me and my friends, this happened about half a year of a child’s life. The fact is that by about this time the strength of the young mothers dried up. And it is precisely at this moment that many place hope in their fathers. And they do not understand why you seemed to be coping, but now you need help.
This misunderstanding can spread to the child. Mom will not have much strength to calm at least a seven-kilogram child, and dad will be annoyed that his baby is crying. To avoid this, I repeat, once again, that dad should be involved in caring for a child from the first days. Let him also have responsibilities related to child care.
Joy and success
Finally, I want to ask moms not to forget to share with the dads the really worthwhile successes of the child. No need to sprinkle husbands with photos of various poses and angles. Send interesting photos when the baby pulls a toy into his mouth, starts to hold his head, slaps the drum – to put it simply, everything is when the child manifests intelligence. This will definitely be a reason for fatherly pride and will only bring him closer to the baby.