decided to adopt
Under the care of the baby to 4-5 years really do not find, except that with health problems, but it is unlikely you will do. Plus in the guardianship there is an advantage only in the material plan, but otherwise – only the minuses (more control, more scuffles then constantly with reports, for formally the son will not be yours, but the state). So if you manage financially, it’s better to adopt, of course.
If your husband supports you, then the opinion of the others is secondary. Perhaps, in time they will even understand and accept, although it is not guaranteed. But in any case, this decision is you and your husband, and not relatives. 😉
From the tips: by age, put in a statement with a margin, i.e. at least at least 6-7 years. You will not be forced to take just such a one, but if you do not find a small one, and eventually change your opinion about age, you do not have to alter the foundries, or we have half a dozen areas with literal letters, and just do not show the children older. : D
Although it is easier for boys to find a little girl than a girl, maybe in your case you’ll be lucky at first. 🙂
On the other hand, it is such a trifle, in comparison with the fact that the child will be in the FAMILY.
And under guardianship will give age 4-5.
and if finances are endless and you do not care about adoption or guardianship, I advise you to take care of it. In time, you can adopt with time, if it is so actual because of your surname. maybe with care there is more trouble (courses and control), but the child will be a little financially protected, the more in ukraine. And the question is not even about money, it’s a guarantee for you and for the child. the courses will tell you more. I also advise them to visit. I adopted and applied for courses myself. But if there was an opportunity to do custody. lucky. You have made the decision and the negative opinion of others should not be important to you. I had a lot of “such” who did not understand and blamed. but my baby is at home and I’m happy about this. he is in the family. And this is important.
all the same it will be hard for the child who temporarily lived in the dog and must return to bio.recognize and get used to. It is also a trauma, in the future the consequences of this trauma are manifested. for this it is necessary to be to the bio to be.
in the child's upbringing, the relationship between ps and bio is important.
Now we are waiting for how not it's banal it sounds like queues to get acquainted with the children.
And do not be afraid of services, you can very much be friends with them. Especially if you are not too lazy and read the laws about their rights and responsibilities. And the payments do not really prevent any family with an average income and 3 children.
And now I have a daughter and a son, both taken at a very tender age. True, the eldest was still adopted, but this is not connected with the policy of services or public opinion.
I was told that from the area my aunt told me what would the adopters send us, I replied - send. Where was this aunt when the ANNIVERSARY HEALTHY !! GIRL! 8 months in the DR was without initiating the assignment of status. (by the way the floor of a respected woman reads this forum) and only in our family this situation has changed.
In general, I replied that they would not hesitate to send. it's only for a few years that nobody has personally phoned me, personally threatened, and even more so, no one came. And the fact that the employees of the guardianship of the oral text "transfer" me I miss the ears. Their job is to pass on the wishes of their superiors.