Children’s hysteria: how to calm a child in 2 minutes
Hello, today we will talk about children’s hysterics. Almost every parent has faced this, but few have coped. We will talk about their causes and what parents need to do in order to stop the child’s hysteria in a matter of minutes.
The psychologist, the creator of the First Children’s Academy and the School of Professional Parents, the business coach and mother of four children (for two with her husband), Marina Romanenko tells about the true causes of the baby’s hysteria and how to stop the child’s hysterics for 2 minutes at any age.
I think you should not look in the directory to understand the definition of hysteria. All parents faced with when their children begin to cry loudly, fall to the floor and do not hear a single reasonable argument, and this can be called hysteria, and it happens in very different ages: in a year, and in 2, and in 10 years. And the reasons for hysterics, as a rule, (now I will tell my parents what I do not want to hear) is when we ignore them. And when the children once, perhaps, came to us, the second or third, something they asked or looked at, or pulled us, and we did not react to them, they choose the ways that we will have to react and, as a rule,; it’s crying, falling, something that we just have to react to.
You may face the fact that your child’s hysterics will begin even literally for about a year, but peak if you take all the children in the world; it’s a half or two years. This is the moment when they do it often, with pleasure and efficiency. And it is very important to understand how to react to it in order to just localize it and change the child’s behavior in a matter of minutes so that he does not have to resort to it constantly.
There is a simple, universal algorithm that will work with any age that will allow you to stop hysterics of your child in less than 2 minutes. It consists of only five points.
- Respond After you heard the baby crying, quickly turn your head to the side where he cries. It is forbidden to talk.
- Join If he is right in front of your feet, then go down to him or if he is a few steps away, approach him. It is forbidden to talk.
- Analysis of the situation Look at the expression on your child’s face. He can cry for various reasons. He can be angry, desperate, that he can not reach you, upset with something, you think this emotion from his face and ask him – Are you upset? You’re angry? At you something did not turn out? And it will be such a bridge that will allow your child to either nod your way, or disagree with you, but you have already included it. And if you did, go to the next point; fourth.
- Deep Situation Analysis And here you need to understand the reason – what happened ?! You can think one thing, but a child in his head can have quite another. Just ask – What’s wrong? Tell me. I want to know, I want to help, or tell me what you want. And the children begin to interact with you. It is very important here not to evaluate what they say, not to criticize and not try to give advice immediately, that they need to act somehow differently. Just listen. Just ask the next question – Anything else? When your child speaks, go to step five.
- Reply to the child You may not agree with the fact that he asked you for candy, chupa-chups, I do not know, iPhone, because in the class everyone bought it. If you do not agree with him, then tell them, honestly – I do not plan to do this to you, I understand you, but I do not plan. That’s why, that’s why, that’s why. I’m sorry. If you agree, then say; My God, thank you for telling me, now I know exactly what to do. Come on, let’s go, we’ll do it.
gave the result, the baby experiences an ailment and needs to call a doctor.