Of course, the situation you are in is not easy for you emotionally. But in order to avoid additional difficulties in the emotional life of a child, a number of efforts will have to be made.
The first is that you need to openly admit that you are divorced from your ex-husband and can now only be parents. And this should be reported directly to the baby – in the language most accessible to him. He must understand that you will not be together as a couple (you did not succeed, it happens that people find it difficult to spend time together, they quarrel), but he definitely has a father and a mother.
In order to declare it correctly, you must first talk to her husband. You’ll have to take a realistic view of the situation: your ex-husband now has family circumstances that take a lot of time and distract.
Say that you understand that it is not easy for him. Make it very clear to him that you have no personal emotional expectations towards him, except for a request to establish regular and predictable communication with the boy (in which you are ready not to interfere), and your communication with each other should only be on parental matters.
If the husband sees in you a calm, dignified and benevolently behaving person who sincerely cares about his son, but does not hysteria hysteria, the chance to establish a more consistent parental behavior will increase. Stick to the rule of never talking bad about a husband to a son, even in a hidden form. All this will help the boy to feel more confident, not to build all sorts of children’s own explanations of what is happening, which happens when children are forced to guess everything themselves.
And it is important for you to take care of yourself – in order to do all this, you will need positive emotions – think about where you can get them. The support of a psychologist may also be useful.