HAPPY PARENTS What is happening in your creative life today? MARIA MAKAROVA Everything is very good in our creative life.
We are preparing to release a new album, which will appear this winter. Some songs from it are already singing at concerts.
And I also teach my own energy charging course – such a synthesis of the most effective exercises from various gymnastics – in the cafe “Shop No. 8”, which is on Chistye Prudy.
S.R. And what happens in your family life?
Your family – who is it? M.M.
It’s me and the kids. Pope Damira, Alexander. But in general, of course, my, our family is much broader.
We have it very strong. I have a mom, dad, whom I love and honor. Unfortunately, they do not live together, but nonetheless.
I had a stepfather who, God rest his soul, was also my second father, and brought up my brothers and I. There are still two aunts, mother’s sisters, whom I also love very much and one of whom I can call the second mom, and her daughter and her children … Finally, my two twin brothers. And our family is expanding and expanding, more and more children, and no longer count all.
There are families where relatives such as aunts and uncles do not communicate very much, you call each other, but we do the opposite. We talk on the phone all the time, find out how things are going, what happened, support each other, meet.
In general, we love each other! So my family is big and strong.
S.R. And that means that the twins didn’t appear in your family for the first time? M.M.
Yes, my mother, like me, also had twins, or rather twins. Only she first was born, and then brothers, and I have first two girls, and then a boy.
S.R. Is it much harder with two children than with one? M.M.
It seems to me that it is easier to give birth first to two, then to one, than at first one, and then to two. Just an experience with twins – this is such a training! One child, even a few years after the first birth, seems easy.
After all, when I first gave birth to two girls, I did not even know what a child was. Two means it is necessary. Immediately you enter a frantic rhythm, and for you it becomes the norm.
Another thing is my mom. First, she gave birth to me, and then, exactly one year later, twins.
And besides boys! I can’t imagine it. Year-old girl and two newborn boys of 3200 and 3300 g!
S.R. What a great!
This is the weight of an ordinary child! M.M. Yes!
It was my girls who were about two kilograms each, and the poor mother, pregnant, walked with a chopstick, could not climb the stairs with such a load. Therefore, it is for me in this regard – the captain.
And, despite the difficulties, mother says that this time, when all the children were small, was for her the happiest.
S.R. Masha, did you really give birth to all the children at home? M.M.
Yes. I am not a traditional person in a general sense. Although it depends on what to call a tradition … So, my pregnancy went very well, and I have never been to a doctor and felt fine.
In general, I don’t like to get into all these social bureaucratic structures, if this is not absolutely necessary. However, about a month before the birth, I still went and registered at the clinic, so that they would not take me to any hospital. Very soon after that, like all pregnant twins, I started giving birth, about a month before the due date.
And it was right on Christmas Eve, which we were going to celebrate with friends. I called a friend, asking what to do, because I have no certificates, they did not have time. And they sent me two absolutely beautiful midwives.
Frankly, I did not expect that childbirth was so tough (although I knew that my mother gave birth for two days), but I survived everything, and Mira and Rosa were born safely.
S.R. And the anesthesia was?
M.M. When you give birth with domestic midwives, you can forget about it. Childbirth pass without any medicine, absolutely naturally, in the old manner.
If I gave birth in the hospital, I have no doubt that on my knees I would have begged the doctors to inject me with an anesthetic, but here – ask, don’t ask, they simply don’t have it.
S.R. Well, what if something went wrong? M.M.
Midwives have a short connection with an ambulance, and she was. But nothing extra was needed.
S.R. Is Damir the same story? M.M.
Yes. By the way, it turned out that my son has two names. When he was born, Alexander and I called him Damir, and dubbed him as Nikolay.
So, I also gave birth to him at home. But only this time I met the midwife beforehand.
We observed the three main rules of childbirth: warm, dark and quiet, turned on candles, quiet music … And I gave birth to Damira Kohl. Moreover, I didn’t do an ultrasound and didn’t know exactly who would be, but I had inner confidence that a son would appear. He appeared, I took him in my arms: “Son!” So beautiful!
And at his birth I tried not to scream, but to sing.
S.R. Did it work? M.M.
Yes! And I discovered some unknown depths in my voice, and in general it seems to me that the vocal quality improves after every birth. True.
As if your voice is making its way from somewhere.
S.R. Childbirth changed you? M.M.
Yes, of course, the whole life is changing. You do not already belong to yourself, you are responsible for the little creatures until they grow up.
Your life is counting from them.
S.R. What is important now in your life? M.M.
For a woman in life there are several main things: children, personal life, self-realization. If there is harmony in all this, then we can say that the table stands firmly, firmly.
Then you feel good.
S.R. Harmony there? M.M.
Harmony is in the process of achieving, let’s say … My girls are already going to school, everything is fine with Kolya too. I still breastfeed him.
S.R. And how much do you feed?
M.M. Well, for almost two years now.
S.R. And with the girls just as long?
M.M. Unfortunately not.
I fed them up to 4 months, because I had to tour, and there was no way for two of them to take it. At first I, of course, decant, and then we transferred them to the mixture, and they began to stay with my mom.
And the son, since he is alone, taking with me everywhere. On all tours, on all concerts, and it gives me the opportunity to breastfeed him for such a long time.
Feed up, more precisely, because he eats all the same as other children at his age.
S.R. The names of your twins are unusual.
Why are they? M.M.
When I was pregnant, in front of my bed was a bookshelf, on which stood the book by Daniel Andreev, The Rose of the World. And I lie, stroke my belly and think: how good it would be for two girls to be born, call them with such beautiful names – Rose and Mira.
In addition, I wanted to name the children in a way that no one of my friends calls me, so that they would not be associated with anyone.
S.R. You said: they are different … MM
Yes. Rose was born first, and she is really a fighting girl, you can say leader.
By the nature of such a small “Shaolin”. Rosa is always on the move, her younger brother is constantly satisfied with all sorts of games, turns him on, makes her laugh, tumbles, runs, jumps.
And Mira is feminine, very tender, vulnerable, so all sensitive, a little bit of a whip.
They are different, like yin and yang. Rose – Yang, solar energy, combat, giving; World – yin, lunar energy, feminine.
Well, the boy, of course, wonderful, our common pet. Everyone plays with him, everyone loves him!
S.R. That is, no jealousy the sisters were not?
M.M. No, on the contrary, the girls were very happy that their brother had appeared. And how he adores them and waits! He calls them both “Mia” – such a combination of Worlds and Roses – or simply “children.”
He wakes up and says: “Children of the cola?”, Which means: “Children at school?” Runs, searches for them in all the rooms, does not find and understands that, yes, children of the cola. And waiting for them.
Only girls come, so much joy! They shout to him: “Malusik, dear, hello!” I can leave him with them, calmly cook in the kitchen, they will play together.
S.R. Any dreams about their future? M.M.
I would like them to do some kind of creativity, whatever, because creativity is what drives, it is self-expression. So I give them the opportunity to choose the direction, they are engaged in different types of arts.
Recently went to karate – this is a martial art. They also go to ballroom dancing, to drawing, to music.
Rosa began to write her songs. Here, from the last:
The frost goes on, the frost goes on:
– Leave all quickly home!
The frost goes on, the frost goes on:
– Or I’ll make you leave!
Approaching you and me.
Do not forget you all about the Christmas tree!
And he asks me: “Mom, how do you think, is enough for a song or another kupletik to write?”
S.R. Do you have any main principle of education?
M.M. I think all mine and any education should be built on love. Sometimes you want to slap, sometimes shout.
But then you realize that the children immediately remove your pattern of behavior, and if you slap once, a rudiment of rudeness appears in a child, you should shout – an embryo of anger. And then the baby begins to mistrust you, maybe even vaccinate somewhere.
That is, even when I really want to do this, I hold back and just say that it is impossible to do that. Or, on the contrary, I would stroke my head and say: “You are a fine fellow, my dear, most kind girl, so beautiful, so clever.” Then she will consider herself as such.
And if you call it harmful or evil, it will become so. Of course, all sorts of situations happen, we also get tired of the day, aggression accumulates in us … And who else should we pour it on?
Here they are, the closest people, and the reason is almost always located. A very big temptation to break loose. But do not do this, it is better to maintain peace, harmony, mutual understanding with all our forces.
And children absorb it, they learn from it. So I noticed: I just have to shout at Rosa or the World – they immediately begin to apply these same methods to the baby.
Therefore – only with love to react to everything.