Your familiar adult women are right, and not so. They are right that you, like your mother, should have authority.
But for this it is absolutely not necessary to beat the children. Moreover, if you have to beat your daughter, that is, to punish her, this already means that there has been a loss of your credibility.
In other words, you somehow made her understand that something cannot be done, that she did not take you seriously. And, of course, it is important that children perceive the parenting is impossible.
To do this, the parent must have an inner feeling, an inner conviction that they will definitely not allow the child to violate a number of certain important rules. And the feeling of normal parental authority, firm position, persuasiveness and allows children to feel that mom and dad can not disobey.
So punishment in the form of beating is often from parental impotence. Then you essentially beat the child for their parental flaws, for the impossibility to gain the upper hand, to assert your power.
The child must face the consequences of breaking the rules. It could be anything. Your angry look, your anger, the ability to eliminate the consequences together.
How to make children obey? Learn to feel the parental power, communicate it to the child and manifest it in an acceptable form.
To do this, most often, it is worth figuring out why it is difficult for you to do it. Usually, this behavior is covered by the lack of adequate experience in your own childhood, if there was either an excessive strict authority of the parents, or also a lack of authority. And at 18, really, it will be too late.
At 18, children need to temporarily stop listening to their parents and leave. in my adult life.