French children, the same age as Bean (the author’s daughter. – Note. Ed.), Sit quietly on their high chairs and wait for food to be brought to them. They eat fish and even vegetables.
They do not scream and do not whimper. The whole family eats snacks first, then hot. And does not leave behind a mountain of garbage … But why?
Can it not be that the children of the French are genetically quieter than others? Or they were forced to obey the method of carrots and sticks? Or, in France, they still practice the old-fashioned educational philosophy “children should be visible, but not heard at the same time?”
“… I really didn’t think that I would penetrate respect for French methods of education. Nobody heard of them, unlike the French high fashion or French cheeses. No one goes to Paris to learn from the French the tactics of authoritative parenting, in which there is no place for feeling guilty.
On the contrary, my familiar moms are horrified by the fact that French women hardly breastfeed and quietly allow their four-year-olds to walk around with nipples in their mouths. But why no one says that most babies in French families begin to sleep at night already in two or three months?
And that they do not need constant adult supervision? And most importantly, they can hear the word “no” and not fall to the floor, huddled in hysterics! ”
“… By the end of our failed beach holiday, I decided to find out what the French are doing differently than we do. Why children of the French do not spit out food at the table?
Why don’t parents yell? What is this invisible force that forces everyone to behave in a civilized way, and how did the French manage to capture it? And most importantly, can I change and apply the same methods to my child? ”
“… The pause method” is not colored by cruelty, in contrast to sleep habituation; it is not teaching, but learning to sleep. But you can learn it for a very limited period of time: Cohen believes that up to four months.
After that, the child will inevitably form the habit of sleeping poorly. The “pause method” is not the only trick used by French parents. But the main one. ”
“… It seems that the French managed to make a miracle: their babies and older children not only wait, they do not mind waiting! Maybe this ability distinguishes French children from others. As for the French parents, they, looking at us, are amazed at our disorder in such an important issue.
For them, living with children who demand the immediate fulfillment of all their desires would be unbearable. ”
“… I’m sharing the news with Anna a bit later: there was a place in the preparatory group of the local kindergarten, and Bean — she was older than everyone else — could start training a year earlier.
– Why ?! – Anna is amazed. “Childhood ends so fast!”
“… Madame Dolto’s ideas about education were extremely radical and corresponded to the spirit of the new time. She advocated a kind of “emancipation of babies,” claiming that children are rational beings and even newborns understand the language immediately after birth … There are legends about how Dolto approached roaring babies in the hospital and patiently explained to them why they are in this place and where their parents are now.
The kids immediately calmed down.
“… A typical lunch (in a manger. – Note. Ed.) Begins with a hearty salad of palm trees and tomatoes. It is followed by turkey with basil and rice in a creamy Provencal sauce. The third dish is Sennekter cheese with a slice of fresh baguette.
For dessert – fresh kiwi. All dishes are cooked from scratch every day. ”
“… The French women do not worry at all about breastfeeding, but they are very concerned about another question: how to get their former form back as soon as possible after giving birth. I was shocked to the depths of my soul, having learned that a thin waitress in a cafe where I go to write my book has a six-year-old son.
I thought she was twenty-three and she was a fashionable party girl. ”
“… In France, the main idea that society brings to mothers is that the role of the mother is important, but should not overshadow other roles.”
“… I admire a lot in the French principles of education, and in times of crisis, not knowing what to do, I often ask myself: what would a Frenchwoman do in my place?”
Autonomie – autonomy. Independence and the ability to rely only on themselves, brought up in children from an early age.
Bêtise is a little prank. Sharing less and more serious offenses helps parents respond accordingly.
Cadre – frames, borders, restrictions. The speaking name of the ideal of French parenthood: children set a clear framework, but within these frameworks given complete freedom.
Doudou is a toy that all babies have, usually soft; with her they fall asleep.
Éveillé / e – awakened, alive, active. Perfect quality french baby.
Another perfect quality is prudence, sage.
Doucement – quiet, careful. One of the words that educators often say to young children.
It means that even babies are able to behave consciously and control their actions.
Maman-taxi – mom-taxi. So called moms, who all the free time carry children from one “development” to another.