Evening news has not even begun, and you already fall down from exhaustion? Take to school, pick up, send to the sports section, do lessons together, put to bed … And if you still need to get ready for tomorrow’s workday, the evening turns into a nightmare: you barely have enough strength to crawl to bed. In the morning you wake up uninspired, a day with a child is like a week, and a week is like a month.
As if contradicting ourselves, we often think: “How quickly time passes!” You do not have time to blink, as he is already 10 years old, and there 15 is on the way. Nevertheless, our “adult” troubles, our fatigue and eternal employment interfere with enjoying all the pleasures of spending time with your child.
To sum up all the time that the kid is in school, sections, with a nanny and friends, it turns out that he doesn’t have much time left for him. Every time you say to yourself: “We will spend this Saturday together,” but then urgent business comes, the child goes to her grandmother, and next week, everything is new.
The older the child, the more his weekends are occupied with various activities, going to the cinema with friends, school trips. And on weekdays, it is rarely possible to allocate for communication with a child: maximum, a couple of hours.
Instead of complaining about the lack of time, focus not on the quantity, but on the quality: two hours of walking in the park, movie viewing, dinner at a restaurant. And even a trip to school can turn into a heart-to-heart talk.
And here are some more life hacking, which will help to “optimize” your joint pastime.
Walking before bed
A walk before bedtime will help the child calm down, and fresh air will bring thoughts in order after a difficult school day. In addition, this is a great opportunity to have a heart-to-heart chat – much better than watching TV together.
The main thing – no distracting activities: go for a walk without a ball, phones and toys. Only then will it be possible to devote time to each other completely.
When you are tired at work so that the only thing you want is to come home and go to bed, it is very easy to engage the autopilot when communicating with your child. But in this case there is a danger of losing everything that you have “worked out” for a long time communicating with the child, because if your mind flies somewhere far away, you can assume that you did not spend time with the child.
Instead, arrange the so-called “parental meditation,” that is, focus on hearing the baby and understanding it.
To gather with the whole family at dinner is already an event (especially at the frantic pace of our life). Nevertheless, it will be much more interesting for a child to spend time at the table if you come up with a theme for this meal: today is Mexican food, tomorrow – Chinese, and the day after tomorrow – pizza.
For one evening, turn your kitchen into an Italian bistro or a sushi bar: when a child is interested in something new and has positive emotions, he is much more willing to share news of the day, funny incidents and stories from school everyday. And yet – this is a great way to connect your baby to cooking, and while mixing salad or washing vegetables, the child will tell you something interesting.
In the morning, remind him: “Today we have an Italian evening!”, And the child will certainly come running for dinner on time.
Walk more often
Agree, there is a big temptation to get in the car and drive to the nearest park for a walk with your child. However, the time that you save to get to it, you can spend on spiritual conversations – that’s just for this you have to walk. Try to use vehicles as little as possible if you can get to your destination on your own: even half an hour that you spend walking to grandmother’s house or to the store is a great way to get closer with your baby.
Chat about everything: what you see around, what are the successes in sports school and what movie you watch in the near future. You can hold hands – unless, of course, the child is still not ashamed of it.
If you do not have urgent business, after you have taken your son to a circle or section, do not rush home, wait for him in a cafe over a cup of coffee and a book: this will help you relax, calm down, and the way back will pass on a positive note.
Of course, we all know that sometimes in some things from a child is more trouble than good, and it is often easier for us to do everything ourselves, without involving the child in the process. Nevertheless, it is important to involve him in adult life. Whether you repair a leaking tap, change a light bulb or paint a fence in the country house – do not forget to call your son to share your experience.
Even if it is still too small, it does not matter: it is important that he know that in the adult world you need to make efforts so that many things work. Leave a moralizing tone, speak in a trusting voice and let the child understand that you believe in him and know that in the future he will be able to help you and do things no worse than yourself.
Play their games
If you allow your child to play computer games, you will have to learn too! And this is not a joke: from time to time fighting in a virtual duel with a child, you will let him know that you are a part of his life.
Most likely, you will not be able to win, but this is for the best: the kid will understand that you, no matter how funny it sounds, are also a man and have your weaknesses. In addition, both of you have fun when you realize how restless you are in simple things for a child.
However, the time for business, fun hour: limit the time spent in front of the computer is still necessary.
We do not encourage you to teach your child to enjoy only food: this is wrong. But almost all children love sweet or flour.
So let them get it perfectly authorized once a week! Think of, for example, every Saturday, you cook a pizza or chocolate shake, donuts or homemade burgers together, and then watch a comedy together, eating your own masterpieces.
Of course, the meaning is not in food, but in the priceless moments that you create with your baby.
Believe me, the child will remember forever these evenings and the smell of dishes that have been jointly prepared with you, and as an adult, he will often remember these pleasant moments. After all, we each have such memories: someone – modeling dumplings with her grandmother, and someone – cooking jam in a huge pelvis.