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10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child’s New Year

10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child's New Year

Do you need this crowd of parasites, which will destroy the holiday table faster than a flock of locusts – a grain of rice? Do you need all these lovers to scream the songs of their violent youth to the guitar and molest the hostess, taking the herringbone for her (or vice versa)? And the child?

He needs all these Uncles Toli and Aunt Oli, who will poke him with poppers and scream how he grew up and why he does not sleep? Conclusion: guests are not needed.

And you will see how magical New Year’s Eve can be, and after it, respectively, the whole next year.

“New Year should be celebrated with relatives”. It is not known who said this, but millions of people are ready to give a holiday (evening) of their lives entirely, only to confirm this opinion, inviting everyone who can be found on the near and far branches of their own family tree to visit.

It’s good if your relationship with your relatives is perfect. And if not? True, for some reason, it is believed that in the New Year all offenses should be forgotten and certainly be seated at the festive table, for example, the mother-in-law, who for six months never wondered if she needed to sit with her grandson. (Your happiness, if you do not know that such, too, are.)
So, dear parents, do not forget that the New Year in the first place is a holiday. And only in the second – all-family.

And if this evening you want to limit your family to only you and your children, do not deny yourself anything. As a last resort, tell those whom you do not want to offend that you are leaving for Turkey, and they will immediately go to other guests.

10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child's New Year

Put your hands on each other’s heart and say: are you able in any other, except December 31, to entrust the day to a foreign (and possibly drunk) person to hand YOUR dad a gift YOU bought? “No, that you, but how dare you, of course, no !!” – you will answer, tearing up the magazine in half from indignation. In this case, what’s the point in inviting custom Santa Claus?

By the way, even a five-year-old baby is unlikely to recognize his own father, if he is dressed up in all necessary fur coats and beards. Props can be rented in advance, borrow blush from mom.

And if you create twilight in the room and highlight dad with a garland from the Christmas tree, the baby will decide for sure that Gromozek has visited him.

No, the gifts themselves are not always a template. The main thing is that the gifts are not template. Of course, purely from a practical point of view, it is very beneficial to give the baby 5 packs of diapers in a festive package.

But then he will grow up and give you a year’s supply of toilet paper. The New Year is just the case when it is worth going to a large and beautiful children’s store and buying the very thing that is far from essential, which you have been trying to sell there for a whole year. Something big, beautiful, bright.

A toy, but not clothes. Unlike you, children do not consider themselves absolutely happy just because they have such a wonderful costume.

But getting a giraffe the size of a father, they will delightfully climb from one to another.

10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child's New Year

Every day we eat artificial food and drive artificial cars. Let the Christmas tree be real!

For the child, after all, it’s important not only the moment when gifts are taken out from under her, but also the fact that something fluffy, disintegrating, smelling of resin and wood appears in the house, as well as the process of its installation and decoration. Dad, who took the Christmas tree out of the closet and assembled it from its component parts, will forever destroy the child’s belief in something genuine.

In addition, it is possible that with time the son will also begin to deceive you.

Doctors say that a child can watch TV for no more than half an hour a day. And then after 5 years.

So do not try to seat him next to you in front of the plasma panel, no matter what Kirkorov would show.
Ideally, on New Year’s holidays, it is better to go somewhere outside the city, to a holiday home or to a country house, where, in addition to the four walls and the blue screen, there is also nature with snowdrifts, snow games, slides and round dances. Believe that even for the fire in the stove, the baby will be more interesting to watch than the incendiary gestures of Moses.

10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child's New Year

We hope it will not be offended, and you will agree that the most important person for you on the planet is not a president at all, but, say, a little prince. (The one who is now trying to bite off a piece of paper from the edge of your journal.) Perhaps he still doesn’t speak very well or even prefers individual sounds at all, but be sure to give him a word a couple of minutes before the chiming clock. We guarantee that at such a fateful moment you will remember his speech for the rest of your life.

Just in case, do not be lazy to shoot it on video. Even if he does not grow up as a president (suppose such an unlikely coincidence of circumstances), then he will be pleased to see the footage of the chronicle.

Have you ever met fathers who are ready to pour a glass of vodka on a baby under the pretext of “but to get used to it” or “so that you do not get drunk afterwards”? Of course, there are none among you.

But according to the statistics of the children’s hospital. Filatov even decent and non-drinking parents sometimes believe that it is possible to pour a little champagne to the baby once a year.

Do not forget that all organisms are different. And if an individual burger somehow survives a tasting, then unpredictable violent changes may occur in the body of another. No need to experiment!

The baby can go nuts on the nipple and will still be happy.

10 precepts of the father or How not to spoil the child's New Year

According to the Moscow Rescue Service, on January 1, all the emergency stations are crammed with injured fire worshipers, and in their ranks there are not only children. Even an adult sane person sometimes forgets that if a firecracker is set on fire but not thrown, it will explode in his hand.

What then to expect from a child aged 2–3 years old, whose thirst for knowledge of the world and the objects that fill it is still stronger than the thirst for profit and power. Even the festive ammunition hidden by a caring dad will be carefully taken out of any, the most secret, closet and, at best, eaten, not blown up.

Conclusion: to reduce powder stocks to a minimum, that is, not to buy at all or to take out of the house and blow up in a safe place.

Some of the fans of the word “regime” will argue with foaming at the mouth that the New Year’s Eve for a child should end immediately after the program “Good night, kids”. Well, in a pinch, immediately after the chiming clock.

In our humble opinion, once a year you can move away from the schedule and put the baby at the moment when he “turns off” himself. Moreover, it will still not be possible to put it in time: children perfectly feel the festive atmosphere and are excited about this much more than you.

Therefore, your main task is not to fall asleep before the child. Baby will be sad to celebrate alone.

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