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7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

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7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

Theres no escaping them ndash; little people and meltdowns go hand in hand. So next time your little one goes into full-blown tantrum mode, remember these, keep calm and carry onhellip;

You and your toddler were enjoying a lovely afternoon in the park when suddenly he flips like a miniature Jekyll and Hyde. Yes, it may seem impossible to think that this is the same friendly little boy who was giving you a hug earlier, but its normal and every mum will have been there. lsquo;During a tantrum, your child is expressing how he feels in the most basic way possible, says Joanne Mallon, author of Toddlers: An Instruction Manual: A Guide to Surviving the Years One to Four (7.99, Nell James Publishing). lsquo;He doesnt yet have the skills to hold back or express himself in a different way. Anger and frustration collide, and the result can be fairly startling.

Try breathing in for a count of five and out for a count of 10 ndash; its the ultimate calmer and de-stresser. The last thing you want to do is to reach similar levels of frustration and anger as your toddler, because hell pick up on it. Youre the adult and need to stay calm, and this will (fingers crossed), help to calm him.

Whatever the reason for your childs tantrums ndash; you cut his sandwiches into triangles when he wanted squares, his sister has chicken pox and he doesnt ndash; remind yourself that hes acting on impulse. lsquo;So while sometimes you can anticipate and avoid a tantrum before it starts, at other times ndash; well, theres not a lot you can do, says Joanne. Though even with the most random of tantrum triggers, you may be able to detect their root in tiredness, boredom frustration or hunger ndash; or all of the above.

The best way to think of a tantrum is like a show or performance. lsquo;Every show needs an audience and sometimes the most effective way to deal with tantrums is to ignore them, says Joanne. lsquo;If you can, pay attention to something else. This will also have the effect of distracting him as he#39;ll wonder what you#39;re up to. Just make sure it#39;s safe to do so and you know he#39;s not hurt for any reason. And its worth remembering that if hes overtired, its not his fault, so its important to be understanding, too.

Or any other song, saying, spiritual mantra ndash; you name it ndash; that helps distract you from the terrifying thing that your toddler has turned into and takes you to your lsquo;happy place.

Toddlers arent especially choosy when it comes to picking a time to have a tantrum. lsquo;When your toddler kicks off in a public place, its easy to feel self conscious, as if other people are judging you, says Joanne. lsquo;The truth is that theyre probably not. Or if they are ndash; well, more fool them. Of course if your toddler has a meltdown in a restaurant or somewhere where there are other people with a reasonable expectation of peace, you should try to remove them from the situation and deal with it elsewhere. lsquo;But remember that as parents, weve all been there or are going through it, too, adds Joanne. lsquo;Be prepared, by thinking about strategies you will use when out and about ndash; because you will have to deal with a public tantrum one day. Strategies you use at home, such as Time Out or ignoring, simply may not be practical elsewhere.

Try not to give in to a tantrum, or you will be storing up problems for future behaviour. lsquo;Giving in teaches your toddler that histrionics will get him what he wants, says Joanne. lsquo;Your child needs to learn what sort of behaviour does and doesnt bring rewards (and a parents undivided attention ndash; even negative attention when youre telling him off ndash; counts as a reward). However, its also worth remembering, that yes, you will waver. lsquo;We all do it sometimes, says Joanne. lsquo;Dont feel bad about it, were all allowed a couple of strikes out now and again. And sometimes it#39;s worth listening to why your toddler is actually upset (if he can get the words out) to see if you can fix the situation.

7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

A bag of Revels for breakfast and youd probably be crashing by 9am. So dont overlook the impact your childs diet can have on his behaviour. If hes regularly flinging himself on the floor, his meals could need a makeover

7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

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7 Things To Tell Yourself When Your Toddler Is Having A Tantrum

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